We at Connecting Now have been up all night, wading through votes, bickering over this 'absentee ballot' nonsense, throwing mugs of lukewarm coffee at the walls, and braiding each other's hair.
Madness, I tell you. Madness.
But not fruitless madness.
Before we get to the main event of B. LaBuff VS A. Wiley, we want to address all this brouhaha about special statuses for the "elderly" that Verna the Rebel spearheaded with Jan, Rita, and Red trailing right behind. Even Janelle and Hanne tried to get in on that action.
Connecting Now has made an effort not to discriminate against/show favoritism to the young or the not-so-young, but are forced at times to accommodate the tyrannical nature of our audience. So all right, you riotous mass, here is your golden calf if you MUST have it.
We have created a status just for our Senior Citizens Brigade.
Rusty Copper Status.
To qualify for this Status, the applicant must find a penny with his/her birth year on it--and this date can not be later than 1947. In other words, if you were born after 1947, you don't qualify. Then we would like a personal statement detailing all the things you *could* have bought with said penny back in the day.
We have a particular fondness for phrases like: "barefoot, in the snow, uphill both ways." etc.
The big perk of this membership is The Earlybird Special. This is a new set of blogs (to be posted at random) that nobody else may comment on before a Rusty Penny Member leaves his/her two cents (bwahahaha) in long, winding, memoir fashion--which she can repeat at will. So be on the lookout for any blog with *EARLYBIRD SPECIAL* or *(EBS)* in the title, cause you'll have first dibs!
Go get 'em, Tigers!
But now for the moment you've all been waiting for: The results of our contentious election!
Though A. Wiley maintained a steady lead throughout the competition, she was not content to sit back and allow the masses to simply carry her into Membership. Always pro-active, Wiley rallied new subscribers to Connecting Now in order to actually EARN herself Stainless Steel Status on her own.
While we do question the fact that she didn't take this initiative earlier, we are nonetheless impressed with her efforts. Additionally, not wanting to be a snooty winner, Wiley graciously petitioned on behalf of her opponent, B. LaBuff, and we think we've come up with a solution that's beneficial to everyone involved--or at least these two candidates.
We have decided that B. LaBuff (who campaigned in a dignified manner the entire way through) will be awarded with Stainless Steel Status and A. Wiley will be our FIRST EVER Titanium Member! It is acceptable to applaud.
Indeed, this adventure has been a fun spirally ride, and we have loved everyone's participation. We at Connecting Now are quite proud of our exceptionally hilarious and astute readership! In fact, we are in awe. Sometimes we sit back, look at one another's braided hair, and intone: We just don't deserve them.
In our current benevolent spirit, we'd also like to remind you to always be mindful, that at any moment, it could be YOU who we feature up here--with or without your permission--so it's always best to make sure that you're a generally awesome person.
Which you probably are.
Thanks again for reading and voting and a hearty Congratulations to both our contestants!
~Lisa and Maddie
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ReplyDeleteAs I was pondering my fate, and sure that I was doomed to a lifetime of the Rusty Tin Membership Level, I was heartened by the news and wish to warmly thank A. Wiley for graciously petitioning on my behalf <3 !
Hearty congratulations to Miss Wiley for her "Get out the vote" skills and blog promotion skills to earn that Titanium Level of membership.
To Lisa and Maddie... what a roller-coaster campaign :) Thank you for the fun and entertainment. To your "all in good will" I'll add my "all in good fun"
I will close this with an appropriate quote for Connecting Now coNUNdrums, (from Charlie Brown), "In the book of life, the answers aren't always in the back."
--Beth LaBuff :)
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Beth, I was real proud to represent you. If I'd been thinking, I would have had someone else, with a better track record for success (like A. Wiley perhaps), take on your campaign. It's appropo that you should quote from Charlie Brown.
ReplyDeleteP.S. I don't know how kindly the Senior Brigade is going to take to your comment about being "doomed" to Rusty Copper Status. They're a tenacious bunch. You might want to start Running Now.
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ReplyDeleteThe status I was so bunglingly referring to was the one below the tarnished or Rusty Copper Status. (the rusty Tin status). Could we (you :) ) change the name of the Rusty Copper Status to the "Patinaed Copper Status" to highlight how age has improved this wonderful group of people (a group that I will soon be joining)?
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OK, since you have unceremoniously excluded me from the "Rusty Copper Status" by virtue of my being born AFTER the arbitrary year of 1947, I will therefore hobble back to my rocking chair and enjoy my iced tea and my memories of 'back in the day.'
ReplyDeleteHMMMPPPPHHH
Beth, I LOVE the idea of "patinaed" and will beg the young whipper snapper for a change in our edict.
ReplyDeleteMJ, you know we're not good with math--yes it was arbitrary--so how old did we make it in order to be in the Rusty Copper Status?
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ReplyDelete...one more thank you...
Heart-felt thanks to those who saw me languishing in my campaign and tried to rescue me.. Thank you! <3
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***Applauds***
ReplyDeleteI would like to thank Connecting Now for this fun event (and it wasn't bad publicity, either) and thank Maddie for her representation. I'd especially like to thank my loving fans.
Beth, you were a great and gracious competitor.
☆ ☆ Amy ☆ ☆
As if - I am good with math? Not so much - I am an accountant (Controller, even) by trade, but alas, I must rely on my calculator, accounting package and excel to add 2 + 2 these days. Perhaps it is my age, or my mind - or both....
ReplyDeleteBack to your question - what was it again?
Who knows? I am 55 - soon to be 56 (sooner than my wife will be, she would say) but born in 1955 - 8 years after your arbitrary cutoff year of 1947. (as I count them off on my fingers...)
Perhaps there should be a 'cranky old man' status? Many days I would meet that lofty goal quite readily.
BYW, if you are "not good with math" - who counted the ballots??
First things First:
ReplyDeleteAmy has stars now????
Second things Second:
Is Amy suggesting this was a publicity stunt? Believe us, no one was more surprised than we were about the 60 comments on the Duking it Out blog. We had NO idea that Beth and Amy--two of the most unassuming people we know, would cause such a stir. Pray tell, WHO could have predicted that?
Third things Third:
We do have a pretty approximate count of the ballots--minus the absentee ones--of course. That's when things got hairy.
Fourth things Fourth:
ixnay on the atinapay--and addiemay is not appyhay. But you didn't hear that from eamay.
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ReplyDeleteLisa and Maddie -- Could you supply a mailing address for those of us who seem to have taken up residence on your blog?
About the ourthfay ingthay... oesday addiemay have a eebay in her onnetbay? :)
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ReplyDeletefyi--the absentee ballot voters are screaming "disenfranchisement!"
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They'd better be careful, because mark my words: we brought Stainless Steel Status into this world, and we can take it out--if you know what I mean. You'd hate to be a "first" in this way, wouldn't you, Beth? Control them.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
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ReplyDeleteLOL! You are a harsh blog mistress, Ms. L R S W F H Mikitarian! <3 U! <---(and I was not trying to brownie-up to you with that, really..) :)
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Well, it looks as if my work here is done. Baray efay monkfay loopay...or something like that.
ReplyDeletePublicity was a happy side effect.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, I have the great powers of opycay astepay.
☆ ☆ Amy ☆ ☆
Well, all I can say is that I'm NOT tarnished although I may look at bit rusty (carry-over from the tomato days of not-so-distant past). But, thank you! At least Seniors Rule around here and for that I'm very grateful. The Bible teaches us that those of age (gray hair) have great wisdom. You would have been doing yourself (and this blog) a disservice by not giving Seniors a special place. So, thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteMy problem now, however, is that it may be difficult finding a penny with my year of birth. They're a collector's item by now and with Honeybun and I living on a very limited income, it's doubtful we'll be able to afford that specialized penny.
Can I have AJ photoshop a penny for me?
Thanks again, dearies! Red is feeling a mite proud of her age this morning. All these years DO count for something!
And, congratulations to the winners! This was a good fight that was well fought.
☆ ☆ Red ☆ ☆
PS: I'm not bilingual. Can someone translate all that gibberish?
Congratulations to the winners, but Lisa,Dear, and Maddie, Darling, y'all surely didn't think I'd want a rusty membership (even if my dear friend, Beth, tried to prettify it up). Besides, I don't think they were making pennies the year I was born--so long ago, you know--my memory, you know. I'll just ease back into my rocking chair, wrap my shawl around my shoulder, and watch the young royalty enjoy their shiny memberships.
ReplyDeleteAll in good cents,
Verna the Rebel
P.S. They did have pig latin back in the day!
Red--Is your hair red or gray? I think you should make up your mind.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, you can have AJ photoshop the penny if you must.
Verna the Rebel--C'moooon now, don't hold out on me! You know you want to be in da club!
Beth--There are two reasons why I am reluctant to accept "Patinaed" Copper Status.
First, I have to clamp down the iron fist SOMEWHERE. I'm worried that after we just bent the rules for your Membership, you'll think you can just roll up in here, changing names, barking orders, and causing chaos just because you can get away with it? Is that how you've raised your kids? Cause Blogger Mama Maddie don't play like that.
Secondly, (and perhaps most importantly) I can never, NEVER, EVER remember how to spell patinaed no matter how much I try. Even just now I had to refer back to your comment to get it right. It may still be wrong, who knows? I don't. And I don't care.
And Lastly, to all our readers, I'd like everyone to give a big round of applause to Lisa, because you guys really have no idea how very LONG it must have taken her to write those sentences in Pig Latin and then decipher your responses.
The next time you see Lisa, verbalize some Pig at her and see how much it throws her for a loop.
She just can't handle it.
So props to you Mom!
:)
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ReplyDeleteMaddie, I beg the blog powers forgiveness for suggesting another level of membership and changing the name of an existing level. In my defense I'm afraid I'll have to claim temporary insanity. I had just been awarded that coveted Stainless Steel Level membership and I'm afrid it went to my head. :)
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Madeline, darling....
ReplyDeleteIn the very beginning I believe I explained to you that our diet of tomatoes and tomato derivatives have caused my gray hair to have a red tint. Must I go back and find the exact wording? It seems you young whippersnappers have a way of misinterpreting things, jumping to conclusions, and then turning around and blaming your elders for confusion when, in fact, any confusion is based on assumption rather than truth.
My hair is gray and the red is finally fading away now that my hands aren't in the red delicacies 24/7, our plates aren't graced with the fresh plump sweet fruit of the vine, and the kettle on the stove is no longer cooking stewed tomatoes, vegetable juice, spaghetti sauce, salsa, tomato soup, and other RED vegetables!
Any more questions, Madeline darling?
☆ ☆ ☆ Red ☆ ☆ ☆
okay...okay...Maddie, since I can tell by your tone that you REALLY want me in the club, I'll take my rusty copper--just as long as I don't have to drink my tea from it! I'd hate to be left out.
ReplyDeleteMik Chiks~Finally got on the computer and sorta caught up with all the goings on. This post regarding the Rusty Copper Status had me rollicking with laughter. Everyone's comments just added to the fun with the Pig Latin being the topping on the Stainless Steel Cake!
ReplyDeleteHI Lyn!--glad the pig latin got two thumbs up from you--Maddie was right on top of it with her comments about my abilities with it.
ReplyDeleteAnd FYI, Maddie--"Calvary" is Verna--gracious Verna--she's in!
Thanks, Lisa, for straightening out my error in checking in--I forgot I had two profiles. (My left side is really better, though!) You know how it is with us "old folks."
ReplyDeleteI'll be searching for my penny as soon as I can find my reading glasses to magnify the dates!
ReplyDeleteGreat fun! Enjoyed all the comments! ROFL