Where NOT to Hide Merchandise

May Kira (the LaBuff's Pooch) only use her folds for good.

Dear Readers,

After writing about the politician's wife who concealed $79, 600 in bribe money in her brassiere (which you can read about HERE), we at Connecting Now never anticipated having to post another conceal-the-goods-on-the-body type of coNUNdrum/Exposé.   

But we were wrong. 

Thanks to Deanna L. for sending us today's news story. It's a rather embarrassing report of two women who allegedly used their adipose tissue, and the folds of their skin (which used to contain adipose tissue), in order to shoplift $2,600 worth of TJ Maxx store merchandise.  I don't want to go into the gruesome details, but an eye witness said she saw one of the women stuff three boots under one breast.  Another report said belly folds and armpits were utilized.  All in all, four pairs of boots, three pairs of jeans, a wallet and gloves were allegedly smothered.

I mean smuggled.

I know a lot of us will gain weight over the holidays, but this is not a responsible use of our newly acquired assets.  After the New Year, many of us (but probably not me) will lose weight, yet this is not a responsible use of ensuing folds. 

Here is the official Mik-Chiks Public Service Announcement:

No good ever came or will come from politicians/citizens (U.S. or otherwise) using their body/adipose/folds/undergarments to smuggle/steal goods/money (bribe or otherwise). 

It's just not smart. Or tasteful.

That should cover it.

 The Lines are Open! We're not hiding anything here.